I had the privilege to go to one day of the Leadership Summit that was done by Willow Creek Church. Had to miss the second day due to some ministry duties. That in itself was a leadership tension. The tension was- do I go and take care of the needs of a family in the church, or do I go and listen (and hopefully learn) how to be a good leader. I know that going to meet the needs of this family and serving them in their time of need was being a good leader and shepherd to them, but what about the two young men that God has put in my life to serve with and to do ministry with at Pearson? Those guys gave up two days of their time to be at this conference.... and I left them hanging. The question that caused me tension is "Did I let them down by leaving to minister to a family in need?" If I hadn't gone to serve this family, would I have let the family down.
Andy Stanley talked about this very thing Thursday evening. He said that there are tensions that will always be in the life of the leader and the church leader especially. The one thing that he said that really took a lot of pressure off of me was that some tensions need to be left alone and used for the good of the organization.
Lk 12:49 “I have come to bring fire on the earth, and how I wish it were already kindled!
Lk 12:50 But I have a baptism to undergo, and how distressed I am until it is completed!
Lk 12:51 Do you think I came to bring peace on earth? No, I tell you, but division.
Lk 12:52 From now on there will be five in one family divided against each other, three against two and two against three.
Lk 12:53 They will be divided, father against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against mother, mother-in-law against daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law against mother-in-law.”
Mt 10:34 “Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword.
Mt 10:35 For I have come to turn “ ‘a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law—
Mt 10:36 a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.’
Mt 10:37 “Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me;
Mt 10:38 and anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me.
Mt 10:39 Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.
Talk about tension….God placed supreme importance on the family in both the Old and New Testaments. In fact, half of the crimes in the OT were family related. We see the importance of family structure in the NT in the teachings of Jesus and Paul.
Now, these words were mainly given to people of Jewish faith. This had to be a really big tension for the disciples. They grew up in a tradition built on family. This tradition said that if you were born into a fisherman’s family, you became a fisherman. Divorce was a life and death matter, and the community shunned those who broke that bond. These people believed in family.
Understanding this, we can see the tension that Jesus just brought in the picture. He was instigating a transition, a shift in spiritual understanding that they had never seen and that we haven’t seen the end of yet.
Look at the first disciples….they actually left their nets to follow him..that was more than giving up a job..that was giving up family business. That was their identity and their family's source of life and income.
When we think about these kinds of words from Jesus, we have to wonder how that fits into his mission. The truth that Jesus was teaching was that, if we press hard into God, we might find ourselves at odds with the people we love. That doesn’t mean that Jesus is set out to make you at odds with your family. It means that, as His child, you will look at the world with from a new vantage point, even your family. Following God wholeheartedly changes the way you relate to family. His teaching is not about abandoning your family but abandoning your cross daily. Abandoning your cross means it will cost you everything.
It is easier for us to think of what we will gain when we enter the Christian life. He wants us to think in terms of what we will lose. It is easier to think about the abundance promised to the follower, and not the sacrifice required to follow. It is easier to think about the Prince of Peace and not the prophetic warrior that we see in these verses.
There is a knot that forms in our stomach when we are faced with the sacrifices we are called to make in following Jesus. Lose your selfishness, your bad habits, your girlfriend, your ambitions, your freedom to live like you want, your bad attitude, your hate, your anger….Jesus was clear if you want to walk with Him you have to walk against the flow.
Mt 10:39 Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.
Jesus is not saying he wants you to lose your life..end of story. He is saying he wants you to find your life. He wants to bring new life but you have to let go of your old one. He wants your relationships to go where only they can go if you are truly following Him. You want a great family life..then be willing to follow me wherever I want you to go.
Jesus’ words to His followers were all about losing the value that they placed on their earthly attachments…..even their families. Perhaps the tension was not so much about family as it was about calling us to a higher purpose than to drift through life validating ourselves to any one set of relationships. He has called us to lose our lives, to live separate from all attachments so we could find real life. When we do that we have the chance reclaim the whole reason we are here in the first place. We have a chance to step away from the things that we think make up our life to hear from the One who has made life.
We have a chance to listen to the Holy Spirit tell who we really are to God. It is not a tension after all.... it is an opportunity of gain not loss. It is an opportunity lead our families by giving it all to God. Maybe, just maybe, Jesus was giving us a principle and not a tension.
The principle is that, if we are willing to give it up, He is willing to make it new.
Maybe if we are willing to follow at all costs then our families may actually be a gain and not a loss. They may gain a new perspective about who we are.
Are You following at all costs?
_
Andy Stanley talked about this very thing Thursday evening. He said that there are tensions that will always be in the life of the leader and the church leader especially. The one thing that he said that really took a lot of pressure off of me was that some tensions need to be left alone and used for the good of the organization.
Lk 12:49 “I have come to bring fire on the earth, and how I wish it were already kindled!
Lk 12:50 But I have a baptism to undergo, and how distressed I am until it is completed!
Lk 12:51 Do you think I came to bring peace on earth? No, I tell you, but division.
Lk 12:52 From now on there will be five in one family divided against each other, three against two and two against three.
Lk 12:53 They will be divided, father against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against mother, mother-in-law against daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law against mother-in-law.”
Mt 10:34 “Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword.
Mt 10:35 For I have come to turn “ ‘a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law—
Mt 10:36 a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.’
Mt 10:37 “Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me;
Mt 10:38 and anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me.
Mt 10:39 Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.
Talk about tension….God placed supreme importance on the family in both the Old and New Testaments. In fact, half of the crimes in the OT were family related. We see the importance of family structure in the NT in the teachings of Jesus and Paul.
Now, these words were mainly given to people of Jewish faith. This had to be a really big tension for the disciples. They grew up in a tradition built on family. This tradition said that if you were born into a fisherman’s family, you became a fisherman. Divorce was a life and death matter, and the community shunned those who broke that bond. These people believed in family.
Understanding this, we can see the tension that Jesus just brought in the picture. He was instigating a transition, a shift in spiritual understanding that they had never seen and that we haven’t seen the end of yet.
Look at the first disciples….they actually left their nets to follow him..that was more than giving up a job..that was giving up family business. That was their identity and their family's source of life and income.
When we think about these kinds of words from Jesus, we have to wonder how that fits into his mission. The truth that Jesus was teaching was that, if we press hard into God, we might find ourselves at odds with the people we love. That doesn’t mean that Jesus is set out to make you at odds with your family. It means that, as His child, you will look at the world with from a new vantage point, even your family. Following God wholeheartedly changes the way you relate to family. His teaching is not about abandoning your family but abandoning your cross daily. Abandoning your cross means it will cost you everything.
It is easier for us to think of what we will gain when we enter the Christian life. He wants us to think in terms of what we will lose. It is easier to think about the abundance promised to the follower, and not the sacrifice required to follow. It is easier to think about the Prince of Peace and not the prophetic warrior that we see in these verses.
There is a knot that forms in our stomach when we are faced with the sacrifices we are called to make in following Jesus. Lose your selfishness, your bad habits, your girlfriend, your ambitions, your freedom to live like you want, your bad attitude, your hate, your anger….Jesus was clear if you want to walk with Him you have to walk against the flow.
Mt 10:39 Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.
Jesus is not saying he wants you to lose your life..end of story. He is saying he wants you to find your life. He wants to bring new life but you have to let go of your old one. He wants your relationships to go where only they can go if you are truly following Him. You want a great family life..then be willing to follow me wherever I want you to go.
Jesus’ words to His followers were all about losing the value that they placed on their earthly attachments…..even their families. Perhaps the tension was not so much about family as it was about calling us to a higher purpose than to drift through life validating ourselves to any one set of relationships. He has called us to lose our lives, to live separate from all attachments so we could find real life. When we do that we have the chance reclaim the whole reason we are here in the first place. We have a chance to step away from the things that we think make up our life to hear from the One who has made life.
We have a chance to listen to the Holy Spirit tell who we really are to God. It is not a tension after all.... it is an opportunity of gain not loss. It is an opportunity lead our families by giving it all to God. Maybe, just maybe, Jesus was giving us a principle and not a tension.
The principle is that, if we are willing to give it up, He is willing to make it new.
Maybe if we are willing to follow at all costs then our families may actually be a gain and not a loss. They may gain a new perspective about who we are.
Are You following at all costs?
_
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